The Road The Dullard Hath Taken
by Azukaramegadriver
Summary: A story arc of epic proportions. Will 2D buy a new fish from the local Wal-mart in time before Noodle is morally offended forever? Will Murdoc ever stop laughing? Will Russel play bagpipes ever again? Will Tattoo find a new love? Stay tuned to find out!


_**Hello, this is Azukara speaking. Don't expect this story to make much of any sense whatsoever. This is me just writing a delicious story about 2D's escapades through a Wal-Mart where ALL GOES WRONG?1!1one**_

'Twas a sad day, yes it was. Mr. Crunkbucket had hit the, erm, bucket. 2D and Noodle wept viciously at the remains of the fish they had tried to keep in that miniature fishbowl for a total of two days before it had raucously vomited in its water, causing it to choke on the low amount of space there was left in the fishbowl and passing away via vomital poisoning. 2D and Noodle were never the same ever again; their _lives were shattered._ How were they supposed to know that a bass was too big to fit inside of the fishbowl? He should've lived quite alright, his head was at least in the water.

At the funeral, Russel played the bagpipes in solitude, while Tattoo recited the USA national anthem in a solemn display of affection for his lost lover that had just recently departed from this world.

Murdoc was in a fit of laughter watching Mr. Crunkbucket take a dive into the aether below the confines of the Plastic Beach, only to be chewed up and spit back out by the haunting whale that frolicked below the surface. "'Aven't you two dullards eva tho't of buyin' a new fesh?", said the nasty looking demon-man with the corn cob pipe and the broken nose and two eyes made out of mismatched coal…ers.

The singer sat there, perplexed throughout all track of thought. This wasn't uncommon; in fact it was nearly everyday practice. This very moment was what was part of 2D's schedule to shut down all brainwave activity in order to think of one solitary subject. Whether today's subject would be of how babies are made, the wingspan of a baby chick, if he could eat himself and get away with it, or how to "accidentally" punch Murdoc in the face and get away with it…. It seemed he had something else in mind this time around. "..we ne'd a neww fesh", said the dullard, who was scratching his head with the most belligerent look on his face.

Noodle gave the look that about summed up to "WHY WOULD WE EVER DO THATTT", and responded quickly with "but we can't replace wittle Mr. Cwunkbucket; he was the best pet we evew had". 2D turned around with a srsface and said loudly **"NO."**

Noodle then proceeded to "_D:_".

2D swam across the ocean at a brisk pace, trying to find a new fish. Alas, he hath found nothing of the sort, just jellyfish with welcoming faces, ready to purge into his vicinity and devour his soul with great intensity. 2D had taken no mind to them and continued progressing to the nearest Wal-mart with a vigorous butterfly stroke that could make nations weep.

Three days later, he came upon entrance to the Glorified Wal-Mart, which perched itself on the top of a very perilous mountain right outside of St. Louis, Missouri. Here would be the place where Stu was sure to find a bass to place in his perfectly-circular fishbowl they had in 2D's donk-tastic cellar no one dared enter besides him and the little Japanese chick that hung around him all the time.

Before crossing the rickety path that dangerously hung itself above the void of gastrophonic nothingness (as this was the entrance to said Glorified Wal-mart); he was stopped by a zombie variation of the Xenomorphs, as seen in the Alien movies. The xenomorphs asked him this very question:

"blegh_eribbleaddbleakdfa"_

Thankfully, 2D could understand xenomorphs whatchamacallit language, and responded in a convenient manner that allowed us to understand what exactly this guy was saying, even though no one else was around. "'Answer me 'fese questions free?' Wot do I look like, summ kindeh knight to you?". The alien had stopped his blithering and blabbering and proceeded to jump off a cliff.

Whatever that was about, the singer didn't care. He proceeded to the Wal-mart in a strutting, egotistic fashion; feeling like he achieved something by wiping that xenomorph clear out with his pure wit. Little did he know that was really the writer getting tired of writing about a xenomorph, and extending a really silly Monty Python joke!

In the meantime, this was never finished.

teh edn~


End file.
